I have to say on the front end of this, that since I am alive, much of this will be about Jesus, whom I am certain saved my soul, and positive saved my life in this body for a purpose about 3 weeks ago.
I am a first grade teacher and I love my job. I love children because that's just how God made me. I love teaching, and I believe it is one of the gifts God created me to use for His glory. I was on my way to work Monday morning, September 13, 2010. I had a typical morning where I get up at 5:30 to make my instant coffee and read my Bible and pray before I take a shower and get ready for work. I wore a cute sundress with sweater and sandals, and drove an adorable turquoise 2007 Toyota Yaris. This car was my very first totally bought and paid for all-by-myself car, in my favorite color, and small enough to park easily anywhere I wanted and make u-turns at the drop of a hat, all using on average 28mpg. I was not even half-way to my school when I was traveling South on a 6 lane road, and a 17 year old girl was traveling North. She needed to take a left turn in front of me to go West down the small intersecting road to her school. The traffic light was yellow for both of us. That is the last thing I remember. "Oh the light just turned yellow. I can make that."
Approximately 30 minutes later I remember staring up at a woman in a blue uniform who was talking calmly and hooking me up to things. My husband John, was calling my name, "Kelly, Kelly, hey, hey, wake up." I remember feeling confused and trapped and sleepy. Someone told me I was in a car accident. I remember telling the ambulance lady, "I thank God for you." I think she said, "I thank God for you!" I was in and out of consciousness on the way to the hospital, and do not remember the ambulance ride, or being taken inside. The next thing I clearly remember is laying in the hospital with John sitting next to me. The back of my head hurt because I was strapped down to a hard, plastic orange stretcher. I think I said, "Well this sucks. I had a lot to do today." It's funny, now. I feel like God was saying, "This will make you stronger. You have a lot to do with your life still."
Because several kind people witnessed the accident and stopped to check on me, I can tell you what happened in the middle of the intersection. Her Lexus SUV thing hit my car mostly on the front, more toward the driver side. I was going about 50mph, she had to be doing almost the same. My air bag immediately deployed, and apparently knocked me unconscious and cut my lip. My car spun several times before going off the road, down a short grassy embankment and landing in a parking lot. I miraculously did not hit any of the 4 large concrete poles that my car went in between. I miraculously did not break a single bone in my body. I miraculously was able to tell whoever opened my car door first "I am a teacher. Call my school. My kids need me. Please make sure my kids have someone. Call my school." As an after thought, I told someone to call my husband. I kept passing out in between phone calls. Someone kindly called 911 and the police and ambulance were there quickly. Later a witness e-mailed me, and when I told her I thought I was knocked out she said, "Yes, I'm sure you were knocked out. I saw your head bouncing around in there a lot." I guess as the car spun, my head just flopped from side to side. The car was totaled. Our insurance sent us a nice fat check for the car. Another lady called to check on me and said that she had stopped and prayed with me. I am so thankful for these helpful people I don't remember.
In the hospital they took many x-rays. I passed out getting x-rays. They tried to give me pain medicine through an IV, but then discovered the IV was not in my vein, because it burned and hurt as she pushed the stuff in and I almost screamed at her. So she tried it with saline and it did the same thing, so she gave up and took the IV out. I cried some when they wouldn't take me off the orange stretcher because it was hurting the back of my head. When I got off of it, I could start to feel my back and neck hurting. My legs had big bruises from where the front of my car had literally caved in on me. My right hip had a large abrasion from the seat-belt. I didn't know seat-belts could cut you through 3 layers of clothing, but they can. My chest hurt, and I realized in the hospital that I was not going to be able to go back to work the next day. I also realized that I really want to have kids.
In the days to follow the accident, John had to help me do almost everything because the back and neck pain made me very immobile and weak. Immediately my school family reached out and was sending me kind, positive, encouraging e-mails, they brought us dinner every night the first week. It was close to a miracle that I got my job. Now I knew that god had put me in such an awesome school because they could take care of my class while I was gone, and I didn't have to worry. I was standing up so much at home because it hurt my back to sit down, that I went to school that Thursday, and walked around very slowly, and regretted being there by the end of the day when my neck and back hurt so bad. I went to a doctor the next day and he gave me pain medicine. Lortab became my new best friend. I went to a chiropractor and they did all sorts of tests and x-rays to tell me that my back and neck were probably hurting a lot. Then they "adjusted" me, which really just means, push down hard on my back to pop it, and turn my head to pop my neck. It all felt good. They gave me ice packs and told me to ice the neck and back for 20 minutes every hour. It helped some. I was able to go back to work on Monday, one week after the accident, for the whole week.
I had never been afraid of anything in my life. The first two weeks after the accident, I had an intense fear of driving. I fought back tears all the way to work, and slammed on my brakes at every yellow light. I waited until almost no one was coming, and got honked at several times. I had to repeat frequently, "The Lord is my protector, He is my healer, He is my strength. Fear is not of the Lord. " I hated driving. I was in John's Altima, which is only a little bigger than my Yaris. Thankfully, this summer we had kind of been given a car, an 02 Dodge Durango with a broken air conditioner. John's helpful dad brought the Durango up from Alabama. The Durango is an SUV, and I immediately fell in love with the bigger, safer feeling I got behind the wheel of that car. But it's older, and it's big, and the doors are very heavy to pull shut. I decided to go off of my lortabs to see how my body still felt. This last Sunday and Monday I took no pills. That Monday, when I left school, my back and neck hurt pretty badly. In God's divine set up, one of our lovely first grade teachers is married to a lawyer, who actually used to handle accident and injury claims just like mine. They invited us over to talk about everything. It helped so much. We had so much more knowledge and peace of mind when we left. My back also hurt a lot. I made an appointment to see an orthopedic doctor. He prescribed me a steroid pack and a new pain killer that is not a narcotic. I am feeling much better. I get to go to physical therapy next week.
Monday night I was able to go to the seminary's wives class that I had been going to, but had missed the Monday of the wreck and then missed the next Monday because I was doing make-up Parent teacher conferences. In that class I was given exactly the verses I needed.
2 Corinthians 1: 3Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, 4who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. 5For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. 6If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. 7And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.
The speaker, a sweet young youth pastor's wife, explained how God lets us experience some hardships so that we can comfort those who go through similar things. I realized that I had never been able to understand fear, or serious pain, before this accident. Now, I feel like I can relate. Now, I feel like I have overcome. God has been with me every step of the way. I know my injuries, and whip lash pain are minor compared to the horrendous difficulties other people have, or I could have easily suffered form the extent of the accident. I feel like Jesus just carried me through this. My angels were all around me, protecting me, helping me.
Then, the verse that made me cry:
10He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us
I realized, God saved me from a deadly wreck. He will save me from future danger. My hope is in Christ, because He will continue to deliver me from danger.
My fear has slowly dissipated since Monday. Today, Friday, almost 3 weeks from the accident, I can say that driving felt almost normal again. I have let this verse sink into me to relieve my fear. I had a great day at school today. We did a project that involved ice cream, so the kids had a great day too. :) My peace has finally returned. I have many, many people's prayers to thank. I am so grateful for the help and support and encouragement I have received from my husband and from my coworkers and a few new friends.
God saved me for a purpose. Maybe it was tell you that He loves you. Jesus Christ died for you.
He came to give you life, to give you a relationship with your creator. I love you. Jesus loves you more. I'm here, and I'm alive and well. Please know that any second, you can be living and breathing and planning your busy day, and then wake up in an ambulance. You could also wake up in heaven, or hell. Do you know where you would wake up if it wasn't earth? If you don't know for sure, then please please please please please, ask me, ask someone, about Jesus Christ, because He is the only one who can save you.
I would have gone to heaven, because I trust Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. Where would you go if someone hit you tomorrow on your way to work?
My Car
The SUV that hit me
So grateful you made it through that scary day. Love you, Kelly!
ReplyDelete